A Slippery Wicket

When I came to Canada, I understood that I was leaving several things behind me, some good, some bad. Meat pies, Passiona and Polly Waffles. Perpetual drought punctuated by flooding. VB and mateship. Blowflies and an assortment of lethally venomous wildlife. Rugby League and Cricket.

Now, this last one didn’t bug me so much – I’ve never been a huge fan of the sport. I understand its place in the cultural history of Australia, I acknowledge Sir Donald Bradman’s position at the pinnacle of cricket greatness, and I recognise several cultural icons of the sport, such as Shane Warne, Steve Waugh and Adam Gilchrist for their efforts in the 80’s and 90’s…

… but the last thing I expected to see on the cover of one of the local freebie newspapers was Toronto mayor David Miller playing Cricket in the snow.

It turns out that there’s a program run by the Royal Bank of Canada – RBC Wicket Cricket – that’s actively trying to introduce the sport to Canadian schools and communities.

The positive thing here, is that this totally reinforces my claims when I first immigrated that we were subtly and surreptitiously starting to take over the world. The Skrulls may have failed in their Secret Invasion, but the Australians have been at this for a while now, even as far back as screen legend Errol Flynn – yup, he was a Tasmanian.

Heck, we have the whole world accepting Hugh Jackman as the world’s most popular fictional Canadian, while fashionable young women wear slippers lined with merino wool as if it’s the epitome of winter fashion.

Cricket may be prevalent in many countries in the world, but I’m interpreting this program as weakening North America’s resistance to our invasion.

Embrace change, North America. Change, meat pies, rugby league, VB, and come to terms with the fact that the Platypus is a noble and dignified marvel of God’s creation…

… that’s still poisonous and cause you some serious grief