Thursday 13 #1: Cardless Characters: Marvel

 

Welcome to the inaugural Lost Hemisphere Thursday Thirteen. Wipe your shoes.

Since this blog is primarilly related to the VS System card game, I thought we’d open the gates by listing thirteen Marvel Comics characters notoriously absent from the game. By notoriously, of course, I simply mean that I’d get a geeky sense of satisfaction if they came to light. Heh.

Now, UDE does a pretty solid job of catching all the cool characters from Marvel, but it’s inevitable that some will slip through the cracks. B-Listers, forgotten heroes and villians, or maybe just characters that give the Design Team headaches trying to work out where to squeeze them into the sets.

Enough! On with the in-no-particular-order thirteen!!!

	1. Spider-Man 2099Possibly the only decent thing to come out of the 2099 series of titles, Miguel O’Hara had his DNA mixed with a spider’s well before they revamped the traditional webhead in Ultimate Spider-Man and the movies.Miguel also had venomous fangs, just to add to the creepy factor… and a hottie holographic housekeeper who became more than a bit player in the series!
	2. Beta Ray BillThe power of Thor, wielded by the last survivor of the Burning Galaxy! Beta Ray Bill is a genetically modified Korbinite, who fought and defeated Thor himself - and then was granted additional power by Odin, and his own Asgardian hammer, Stormbreaker.Why is this legend only portrayed in VS in the art on a plot twist?? Gimme a character card, dammit!
	3. Death’s Head IIDefinitely a feature of the 90’s anti-hero movment and pretty much only popular in the UK, Death’s Head was still a very entertaining read, and an intriguing visual, yes? His weapon-arm may well have been inspirational for the creation of Random.After the cybernetic Minion schmucked Death’s Head, our protagonist thumbed his nose at the would-be assassin by uploading himself over Minion’s own programming and assuming the new, nastier form of Death’s Head II
	4. SasquatchNow, Sasquatch is only one member of the mysteriously-absent-from-VS Alpha Flight, but I’ve always had a soft spot for Dr Walter Langkowswki.I highly recommend picking up the first issue of the Omega Flight mini-series, written by Michael Avon Oeming, if only so you can get a chuckle out of the kid’s reactions when Walter tries to give a guest lesson at a school.
	5. WraithA new player on Marvel’s cosmic scene, Wraith is a unique soul descended from Kree stock, but bonded with a symbiote that pretty much deadens him to everything. Extreme pain is about the only thing that can help him get back in touch with emotions he used to feel.Sure, he’s a poster boy for emo weepy stuff, but he makes for a hell of a visual, and his gun/whip thingie is pretty damn awesome.
	6. Awesome AndyHands down the coolest supporting character in the current She-Hulk series, the Mad Thinker’s Awesome Android was emancipated and granted some sort of citizenship, I guess, and ended up working as a gopher at the law firm that hires She-Hulk.The character is charming, endearing, and dammit, just plain likable! Awesome Andy FTW!
	7. Beverly SwitzerThe MTU expansion gave us Howard the Duck - he even got a playmat - but how is it that we have Howard, but not his ever-present buxom red-head companion, Beverly*waaagh*
	8. HepzibahYou know, I’ve never really figured out if she’s meant to be a cat woman or a skunk woman. I seem to recall earlier depictions of her having a skunk tail, but more recent ones being more feline.Either way, the grammatically challenged Starjammer would be groovy to have on a card. Not only is she a cat lady, she’s a PIRATE cat lady! Aaaarrr!
	9. HussarJust as Sasquatch was kinda standing in for the rest of Alpha Flight, Hussar’s here representing the Shi’ar Imperial Guard.Sure, we got Gladiator… kinda… but the Imperial Guard’s an entire roster to rival the Avengers, for cryin’ out loud. Besides, who DOESN’T want to see what Alex Horley can do with all that leg hair?
	10. War MachineDesigned by Tony Stark as the latest Iron Man suit after a period when his entire central nervous system was pretty much in shutdown, the War Machine armour was later adopted by Jim Rhodes, who had previously stood in as Iron Man when Tony was hitting the bottle.The whole intro issue for the armour, against the cybertech ninja trio the Masters of Silence, was just plain funky cool.
	11. The MandarinIf we’re going to have War Machine, let’s have one of Iron Man’s quintessential foes, The Mandarin.A holdback to a much less politically correct era, the Mandarin at least updated his wardrobe over the years to look regal. The Hands of the Mandarin crossover is still one of my favourite tales from the 1990’s.
	12. BroodI’m not talking specifically about the Brood who joined up with Hulk’s Warbound, I’m talking about the entire damn species.These guys are one of the most feared foes of the X-Men, why the heck haven’t we got army versions? You just KNOW Stubarnes wants them on some level…
	13. Hogun the GrimAnother incidence of one character standing in for his people, where the heck are the Asgardians?We’ve got multiple Thor’s… but not a single Loki. Odin. Sif. Baldur. Heimdall. Sure, we’ve got Surtur, but he smells like sulfur and always tries to spike the punch at underage parties. Bring on the Warriors Three! Hogun most of all though, his manly ’stache and dour demeanour make him a real hit with the ladies.